Carol
Drage lent me this book, saying that it was excellent. I was really ambivalent
about reading it as it is about a young mother who is dying of terminal cancer
and I really don’t like reading or watching stuff that is depressing. So I
peeped at it - and got drawn in… despite the heartbreaking subject, the story
had so much humour and so many other scenarios to balance it. I gave it to my
eldest daughter and she phoned me to say that she had the same experience and is
passing it on to Kerensa.
Mia
Hayes, an Irish journalist usually known as Rabbit, loves her life. She loves
her spirited 12 year old daughter, Juliet and her colourful, unruly
family.
But
it turns out the world has other plans for Rabbit, She’s dying and nothing can
be done about it. As the family visits her in the hospice, we get to know her
story, as the narration switches between past and present.
Although
the story revolves around her large Irish family, there are lots of additional
important characters as the story takes us back in time. So, as well as her
twelve year old daughter Juliet and her parents, we are introduced to the love
of her life, Johnny Faye who was the lead singer in the Kitchen Sink band where
Rabbit’s brother played. Her siblings, the siblings' partners, the friends, the
friends' partners, and the members of the band - they are all interlaced into
the plot. All the characters are well described and believable, I wrote all
their names down so I could more easily remember who was who.
The
book deals with how Rabbit is coping with her imminent death as well as how this
wider circle of family and friends are coming to terms with the impending loss
of a loved one.
It’s
commonly accepted that there are seven emotional stages of grief which are
usually understood to be shock or disbelief, denial, bargaining, guilt, anger,
depression, and acceptance and/or hope. I reckon the book addressed all of these
symptoms because the story is told from many points of view. Through the eyes of
the various characters it describes how each of them struggled with their own
feelings as they try to come to terms with the unavoidable. The book tackles
tough issues such as how Rabbit and the family agonise over how to break the
news to her young daughter Juliet, and how to decide who will continue to look
after Juliet after Rabbit’s death. The author deals with the whole subject of
bereavement with a direct, honest and informative approach, and it’s done
sensitively.
However,
this story is not all darkness and gloom and despite the sad subject matter it
wasn’t maudlin or over dramatised. The story is as much a celebration of
Rabbit's life and achievements as about her illness.
Like
me, I think most people who have faced the situation of terminal illness and
bereavement have experienced moments of humour and laughter, and so I easily
identified with this. I sniggered throughout and actually laughed out loud at
times. In fact the style of writing was generally light and easy and her style
was pleasure to read.
So,
to summarise, the book is poignant, yet incredibly funny and is beautifully
written. I felt like I knew and loved the family and friends. It is a memorable
book that will stay with me for a long time and will probably be one of my all
time favourites.
There’s
a really excellent book by Elizabeth Kubler Ross which is invaluable to those
who are dying or are suffering a bereavement. It’s called On Death and Dying.
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